Posts Tagged ‘festivals’

Abrasive Audio…Wacken 2020

Battle for Wacken; W.O.A 2020’ (USA)

Wacken metal battle 2020

Who here has no idea what “Wacken” is? I believe there are scant few (though I could be mistaken). Obviously, the word in question is more than merely that,,_Schleswig-Holstein it’s a location (near the town of Izehoe which, rather useless fun fact here, is twined with a town in England where I used to reside many moons ago). Wacken is also the annual site of one of the world’s largest metal gatherings. That however is not all that it is famous for. Other than having a coat of arm which appears to contain naught but an angry, hungry (“Hangry”?), frogs face, Wacken is known for farming. This however barely beats out the economic boom which metal (in all of its various guises) brings to the region. Every year, for over thirty years, locals have been gladly putting up with (barely) collective hordes sporting various attire, a noise level at decibel levels which could level nearby Swiss mountains, the road sign being stolen and a common greeting (though it’s used for far more than merely that) which far surpasses the pleasantries heard in most languages. Commonly referred to as “Horns” the figuration has recently been showcased to help sell cereal though is more widespread in showing one’s appreciation of the audio on offer. The next festival (July 30th through August 1st 2020) is already sold out and is scheduled to feature, among others, Judas Priest, Mercyful Fate, Amon Amarth, Sodom, Annihilator, Overkill, Venom, Sick of It All, Nervosa, U.D.O., Hypocrisy, Death Angel, Beast in Black, and At the Gates.

(Wacken Open Air 2019 – Official Trailer)

So, why the history and geography lesson? Well, its time for another. And I’ve just been gotten word that its time for those interested to apply for a chance to appear next to their idols. What many might be unaware of is that there are various ‘Wacken shows’ around the world (what?)  Allow me to explain.  As well as those mentioned above various others will also appear on stage. The complete lineup has not been confirmed yet and will comprise of ‘combatants’ from around the world. Select cities across the US host qualifying rounds with a national champion set to be crowned at the festival itself. For over a decade now this tournament has been added to the festivals roster. So how does one apply, and why wouldn’t one honestly want to? Seems as I’m here to help I have the address to check out and a little information on the festivities themselves. Without further ado here’s a spot of ‘cut and paste’ action.

BnB cut n paste

Cut n paste! Cut n Paste! CutnPasstte-!

“2020 battles will be held in Phoenix, AZ, Tucson, AZ, Inland Empire, CA, Los Angeles, CA, Oakland, CA, Sacramento, CA, San Diego, CA, San Francisco, CA, Atlanta, GA, New Orleans, LA, Las Vegas, NV, New York City, NY, Portland, OR, Austin, TX, Fort Worth, TX, San Antonio, TX, Houston, TX, Seattle, WA with more to be announced.

Concert promoters interested in hosting a Wacken battle in their city can apply at this link:

How it works (*this is the interesting part)

Participating cities will host qualifying rounds plus a city final organized by a local city concert promoter where one band will move forward to the American national final (date and city to be determined). The winner of the national final will move on to perform at the 31st edition of Wacken Open Air and compete against the winners of 29 other countries in a final global battle.  All bands will be judged during battle rounds by respected local music industry representatives.


toxic ruin

Last year’s 2019 national final was hosted in Los Angeles, CA and featured Dissentience (Winners, East Coast), Monarch (Winners, West Coast), Nahaya (Winners, Texas), Toxic Ruin (Winners, Chicago), Violence System (Winners, Atlanta) whom were selected from over a hundred bands that participated in battles across the USA.


Previous winners have included;

2019 – WMBU Winner

Monarch (San Diego, CA)

(Video – Live at Wacken 2019)

2018 – WMBU Winner


voices of ruin

2017 – WMBU Winner

CORPSE HOARDER (Philadelphia, PA)

Sponsors/Partners (for this event and the lead up to it include):

corpse hoarder

Dungeon Works Productions

Asher Media Relations

Fatal Illness Management

Come and Take It Productions

Mosh Pit Army

Masquerade Atlanta

Saint Vitus

Huge thanks go out to Asher Media Relations for sending over the relevant information so that I could compose this.

excited animal gif

Yep Yep Yep! Do It!!

Dammit, what are you waiting for? Apply already so that your ideas, talent, composition brilliance and completed audio might reach those and the heights which it deserves to. #SupporttheScene #KeeptheSceneAliveandThriving



Attack of the Compilation – Extreme Metal Attack (anno XVI)


Extreme Metal Attack (anno XVI)
HelldProd Records
Release – March/22/2019

(Celebrating the 16th event of its kind in Portugal scheduled for March 22/23, 2019)

Release date March/22/2019

extreme metal attack 2019

Well hello again.

Cult’s house is empty.

It’s quiet. Which is strange as the spawn of Cult usually leaves a tornado of destruction in her wake, she isn’t shy about letting loose amplified power from her infantile pipes either, the words “I’m a princess!!” Never fails to leave a smirk on my gnarly visage.

I’m discovering new stuff every day. Like where Cult secretes his sugary goods in order that his lips are the only ones to taste them (clever bastid!). I believe I’ve found his weakness however, if it even comes down to it all I’ll ever need do is hold one of his beloved Funkos hostage and he’ll be like putty in my grasp.

Now, where was I? I got distracted.

Ah, there’s his computer. One nudge of the table on which it’s perched and the screen flashes into life. It appears Cult has left me a template (what a nice fellow), either that or he didn’t get around to finishing this. Ha! I’ll make his day and do it for him.

Now what do we have here? An underground metal compilation supporting a festival in Portugal. I’ve visited numerous times. The people are tasty (though there’s no ketchup in sight) and the language is like the exquisite howling of a tortured soul to my ears.

Hmm-! My interest is perked, my nipples are hard, I’ll spare you the description of my aroused genitals. Let’s take a listen, shall we?

Well, would ya look at that. It seems as though, on visual contact anyway, this compilation seems right up my alley (there’s a ‘double-entendre’ if ever I visualized one, yuck!)

The track title is enough to raise the hackles of a hell hound with a hankering for audio extreme.


Wait. I smell audio extreme. I’ll save you for later!

‘Fire’, ‘Daemons’, ‘Abominations’, ‘Deathchant’ and ‘Unholy Semen’ (full of salty protein nutrition, no doubt, at least that’s how I’d spin it on a first date) all words which I’m intimately familiar with though which still never fail to grab my attention. Now, where was I? A tray full of snacks, Chef mix, donuts? I jest, I have the attention of a flea. But, strangely, where metal is concerned, I’m hyper-vigilant, if only I had the memory to match.

Perusing articles of a similar nature I can see that Cult has devised a rating system especially for the purpose of releases such as this. I like it, but it won’t work in this instance, I need my own flavor.

Let’s try this instead.


Not in the good way. Toss this in the ocean and punch the nearest passerby to let out the frustration of spending money on schiite such as this. Jesus might like this. But I still believe it has the potential to do naught but line the birds cage. Jesus loves everything, which in my opinion is rather silly. Jesus you’re a prat!



Better, this shows potential. Much like, I’d imagine, your mother on a first date. But it still leaves me wanting.

The Goblin are going crazy!

Admittedly the annoying green bastid like most things and get excited at the drop of a turd but occasionally they have a suggestion which turns heads. And if the whole collective, much like an obnoxious stench-ridden green tide, agrees there must be something worth giving, at least, a cursory glance towards.

Time for a Crimson Splattered Moshpit!

Now this is worth sharing, break out the goblets, the fiery liquid, the unwilling, let’s break some limbs and party till the Dark Lord yells at us to get back to work!

All Mine!

I’m a selfish bastid. And this is too fkn’ good to share, it’s all mine!!

confued Orc

I’m confused, still!


That’s better, get the point? I don’t care, let’s continue.

Nine tracks in all, and I’ll be if each one of them doesn’t excite in their own way.

Nocturnal are to first to rip into the senses, the track appears oddly ironic. I’m bouncing around like a primate with its a lit firecracker in its anus. Let’s just say Cult is going to return home to find shit all outta’ whack. The place is destroyed, his coffee is on the carpet (not to fret it’s in a spill proof type container thing) one of the legs of his side table is reduced to splinters, several (of the various) notebooks from his desks is confetti and the picture of the smiling green guy above his desk is slightly askew. I need to calm down. But what a start. Damn!

The audio continues. There’s no frilly crap to be found here folks I can make that out within no time at all. Blackened speed/thrash, black metal and black every-goddamn-thing else is on the menu, venomous vocals which would strip primer from a myriad of vehicles in a gangsters paradise (whatever that means) complement rhythms inciteful enough to raise the Dead (keep the ‘toilet water’ handy, corpses have a stench to cut through even the most wicked of sinus blockage).

After a solitary listen, I’ll grant this a rating of Time for a Crimson Splattered Moshpit within spitting distance of the All Mine! rating.

Overall this collection is one I’d gladly take a few lashings for, my boss is a split-tongued, pitch fork wielding, demanding cock-nugget, what can I say?

Within the collection there are a handful of tracks I lost total control of my body over whilst listening, tracks I’d gladly place on an infernal playlist and irreparably damage my misshapen torso to.

In order…


Nocturnal – Rising Daemons

Fast as unholy fuck with rhythms to match and wicked vocals and a nod to vintage speed metal. An amazing introduction to this, or any compilation. My neck is broken, again, from the vigorous head bangin’, I’ll have to reset it (but it was worth it!)

Dethronation – Deathchant Assyria

Try as hard as I might I can’t help but bounce from one wall to the next with this between my ears. Old-school blackened speed and attitude with a South American feel. What’s not to like?

Did I mention this has an epic length and passages of doom tinged atmosphere, nope? Well I apologize. Great track!


Blackevil – Between Fire and Fire

What is it about “speed” that gets to me so?

This question might never be answered, in much the same way human males have a fascination of over-sized mounds of chest fat fit to bursting.

Blackevil have somehow fused NWOBHM with blackened speed with a familiar vocal style I can’t for the infernal life of me place (there’s that shit memory again). Regardless this fkn’ rips!!

Nefastu – Belica Neblina

Blistering black metal similar to Tatgren’s scorching Abyss output. Need I say more, probably not, but I will.

Alcoholocaust – Supreme Heavy Metal Negro

Chainsaws and machine guns and there’s the N word in the title. One of these three things is enough to incite a riot in the liberal mind, the other two are used to exhaustion every night in the suburbs of Chicago. Take your pick, I’ll be busy acting like a frenzied force of nature as I prance around without a care in the world.


Martyrium – Abominations

Easily the most polished sounding track here. This boasts epic values and sports black, death and doom, albeit pitch in tone, elements.

It’s the sacrificial aura that does it for me, however. Gteat stuff!

Necromutilator – Unholy Semen of Doom

I swear if this track sucked especially with the words ‘unholy semen’ in its title I’d hurt a Mfer’. Thankfully it doesn’t! Groove aplenty.

toxik attack

Toxik Attack – Loucos Pelo Old School

I can’t for the life of me make out what they are saying but I’m loving this. It has a folk/heavy metal/speed metal vibe which I’m finding irresistible.

That’s about it, this compilation made me jizz all over the damn place, several times in fact, caused me a concussion from slipping in the mess and resulted in an unfathomable amount of broken bones. Not to worry they’ll knit together again, and I’ll become infinitely uglier.  This is par for the course and I’ve become accustomed to it.

Fuk, I hear footsteps, I’ve no time to clean up. Perhaps a note will suffice…?

There, I’ve placed it where it will be easily spotted.

Oh, what does it say?

Sorry Daddy, it was me.

Love M.

No one will ever know.

Now to secreting myself where no one will find me. Wait a minute. She’s barely two, do you think she even knows how to brandish a crayon, or use punctuation?

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